A Beautiful Day

The morning awoke to bright happy skies over Brunswick Forest and cheery sunshine spread across its stately trees and open meadows, its rolling parks, and its flowering gardens. The lagoons reflected the Carolina blue of the sky. Resident ducks happily paddled around their soon-to-be nurseries and resident dogs happily pulled their human pets through the environs with jaunty steps and pleasant dispositions.

I've always felt that morning is the canvas on which nature paints its masterpiece and this particular morning did not disappoint. It's important on a day like this to pay close attention to what's happening outside one's head. Only in that way can the day remain fresh and bright.

My stroll around Brunswick Forest can be relied upon to get the day off to a good start and then a cup of steaming Jah's mercy from the local beanery helps to give momentum to the joyful beginnings.

Now, I'm not absolutely certain of the original source, but I think the odds are in favor of it being one of Shakespeare's gags, that just as one is thinking It's a wonderful world, the Fate sisters are waiting around the corner with a bit of lead pipe.

It's widely known among friends, that where others fall victim to subterfuge and misdirection, I take immediate action! Catherine I of Russia did the same I'm told. And so it was with me the work of an instant to get myself to Native Grounds for a steaming cup of fresh brewed. 

I hoped to find my god-niece Lupe and her roommate Claudia among those present and enjoying the globally grown but locally roasted. They were there. It was beginning to look like a beautiful day for the duration.

For those of you who visit The Circular Journey daily, you will understand just how juicy the day had become when I tell you that when finding the two members of the inner circle waiting for me, Princess Amy began singing the Louis Armstrong version of What A Wonderful World.

I consider Lupe, a young geezer of fifteen years, to be my most trusted confidant and advisor. You may think her a bit young to fill such an important role but I've learned that by the age of eleven or twelve women have acquired a poise and understanding of the absurdities of life that men can only hope to achieve somewhere in their mid-seventies.

And this Lupe is one of the masters. I doubt she's ever encountered a charging rhinoceros, and probably will never have the pleasure, but if she did, I have no doubt the animal, under her steadfast gaze, would stop in mid-stride, roll over, and begin purring with its legs in the air.

"Hello, Genome," said Claudia, "join us."

"Wow," said Lupe, "you look like something the dog dragged in and intended to bury later on when it had the time."

"And a bright good morning to the both of you," I said. "And Lupe I'm going to take your remark as one of those friendly little jabs that we sometimes cough up to those we love the most."

"Okay," she said.

"I'll order coffee now," I said, "and give you two time to prepare yourselves to counsel and advise. I'm tied in a Gordian knot and need a little unraveling. It seems that every day I know less and less about more and more."

"What's the knot?" asked Claudia.

"It's about a decision I have to make," I said, "and there are very good consequences and potentially uncomfortable consequences no matter which option I choose."

"Oh, good," said Claudia.

"Good?" I said. "Would you call it good?"

"Oh look," Lupe said, "Don't overthink it." To paraphrase Shakespeare, If you're going to do a thing, you might as well do it now and get it over with."

"But it seems the most prudent thing to do would be to make a list of the pros and cons and see how the thing adds up," I said.

"Nope," she said.

"Nope?" I said.

"When young people face life-changing choices, they do it with their entire future ahead of them. Their decision can be made without anxiety and trepidation. 

But when someone old, like you," and at this juncture in the monologue she gave me a sidelong glance as if to see how I was taking it. She continued, "When someone old is faced with an uncomfortable choice, the mixture of future and past only makes knowing what to do all that more difficult."

 

"So you're saying I should stop analyzing and just get on with it," I said.

"Yeah," she said, "and if it doesn't work out, you can feel confident in changing your mind and trying something else. Simple"

"Simple for you maybe," I said. "I understand your point, and I suppose I approve in principle, the broad, general idea."

"Well, there you go then," said Claudia.

"But when it comes to actually doing the thing," I said, "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak."

"I understand," said Lupe.

"Yeah," said Claudia, "the same thing bothered Hamlet. But don't worry about it," she said. "Life is too short."

"Yeah," said Lupe. "So get going is my advice. I think Aunt Maggie said it best when she said, Once more unto the breach, or fill up the wall with our spent coffee grounds. Yoicks! Tally-ho! Hark for'ard!"

Over my head. Every bit of it. She had a smile on her face and a twinkle in her eye when she said it so I assume there's hidden meaning. If it has any meaning for you, leave a comment below.

The only bit I got was the bit about get going and when this young savant says get going, you get going.

Still, I wasn't in a cheery mood as I made my way out into the great wide open. It was only with some small satisfaction that I realized the street was fairly empty. Only one long, dark sedan cruised slowly up Castle Street with the volume turned up to about an 8 on the Richter Scale.

Feed The Monkey

You know how you sometimes feel that it's time to do something different? You are drawn to do something out of the ordinary. You think you're routine needs a little spice? 

This morning was that morning for me. I decided it was time to visit Drift Caffeine Emporium on Ocean Isle Beach. The morning was bright and fair. The Intracoastal Waterway was bright and blue as I crossed the bridge to the island. I could hear the surf stirring the sandy beach as I made my way to the cafe.

Imagine my surprise when I entered and found Lupe, accompanied by Claudia, talking to a seated group in a circle. My first thought was seance, you know how the mind does turn to these ideas, but when I saw no table, I realized that a seance isn't possible without the ethereal knocking trick.

Lupe was talking to a young woman at the moment I entered and I noticed a bit of a start on her part when she first saw me. I refer to Lupe and not the young woman. It was only a quick glance but it had the look one gives when you realize the cat is drinking from your glass of soda.

"You must be firm, Stevie." she was saying as I waited on my Americano. "You can't waiver. If you show any weakness, he will exploit it."

"I don't think he would ever do that," said Stevie. "He's not that kind of guy and even if he did, I believe it would happen only because he cares so much for me."

"No," Stevie. "He has an untreated addiction and is unable to control himself. He will do anything necessary to feed the monkey."

"But it's so hard to say no to him," Steve said.

"That's why you must ignore his calls, his texts, and reach out to others in the group," said Lupe. "And keep coming to these meetings. We can only recover from our addiction when we rely on others. No one can do it alone."

Stevie seemed to see the truth in her statements. She nodded, sighed deeply, and remained silent. 

"Ok," said Lupe, "let's take five."

With those words, she rose and walked my way.

"What are you doing here?" she said to me.

"I would ask the same of you," I said. "I've been coming to this coffee house for years and I've never seen you here before."

She didn't reply but nodded and took on the look of an American who is about to try speaking Cantonese.

"What I'm really interested in," I said, "is how you came to be counceling people with substance addictions."

"Not substance addictions," she said. "Love."

"Love?" I said. "Did you say love?"

"Yes, I did. Love. Lust. Twitter-pated. It's all the same disease."

"You think love is a disease? An addiction? Lupe! This is just not right. There ought to be a law."

"There isn't," said Claudia who had finally joined us at the order-here counter. "We checked."

"Lupe, this must stop immediately," I said.

"Genome," she said, "as though addressing a student in her class, "each of us must be the change we want to see in the world and this," she said with a flourish of the heand, "is it for me."

"This can't possibly work out well," I said.

"Never undestimate the power of the individual to bring change to the world," she said. "Indeed, it's the only thing that ever has."

It's a Native Thing

"Nice coffee mug," said Claudia. "You must be a huge fan of Christmas."

I looked at it. The mug I mean. The background color is a striking red and it has large white snowflakes adorning the sides. I suppose I can understand why people think it signals the holiday. Be my guest.

"I drink from it throughout the winter season, I said, and I'm still under the care of Feldspar, my winter guide. Not that he has anything to do with my choice of drink joy, but still, there it is.

"Feldspar? Is that your spirit guide," she asked.

"He's a rock troll," I said, "and I suppose you could say that he's my spirit guide, and possibly get away with that in some circles, but he prefers to be called a sponsor."

"Sponsor?" she said.

And so here it was again. Every time I try to give someone insight into the life of yours truly, I run into the mountainlike obstacle, that the Genome life is somewhat alien. Maybe I'm a pod-person, I don't know. It just seems like a lot of trouble, a waste of breath, before I get to the point I want to make.

But this Claudia is a good egg and I want to be courteous and understanding. Her best friend, who happens to be another good egg and my god-neice, is also with us in Native Grounds this morning and I certainly don't want to embarrass her. I also don't want to cross her because she's my greatest ally when it comes to Genome's foreign policy.

"I've walked the Chatsford Forest for the past three summers," I explained. "I have a routine. As soon as I enter the edge of the forest, I turn to face the east and sing a song of gratitude to the dawn. Makes me happy and makes for a good day to die."

"A good what?" she said.

"Oh, sorry," I said and I was thinking that at this rate we'll never get to the end of the blog post.

"No need to freak," I said. "It's not what you think; it's an Indian thing. You might think of it as Native American or indigenous. But this is all diverting and we don't have time to go into it right now. My coffee's getting cold."

"Oh, of course," she said. "I remember hearing that phrase once before. A good day to die. Meaning that I've lived without accumulating regret and all amends have been made. Got it."

"Well, once I've completed my Fierce Qigong salutations, I'm immersed in exoteric nature and I'm in the Daoist zone. I'm ready to set out on the path that hugs Gazebo Lagoon and takes me to my rock on the banks of Fountain Lagoon."

"Right," she said. "I understood less than half of what you just said but I'm getting a whispy gist of it I think."

A quick glance at Lupe told me that she was enjoying this repartee immensely. Her eyes were wide as saucers and there was a distinct glow of glee on her map. I'm sure she was hoping for a total bust-up, ending with a wet smack and a complete miss. But I continued.

"I met Mockingbird a few summers ago when I found her high atop the welcome sign near the community center. She was singing to raise the sun but still finding the time to catch reckless mosquitos that drifted up from the marsh below."

"The way you say Mockingbird makes me think she was a guide too," said Claudia.

"That's right," I said. "After hearing her story about being responsible for starting each day by waking the sun with her song--I'm talking about Mockingbird--I felt called to ask her to sponsor me; or to be my guide if that's the way you're bent. She graciously accepted my request to become her disciple, but she suggested that I might want to take additional precautions by introducing myself to Rock and asking for his support as well."

"I must admit to being quite skeptical of becoming dependent on a rock until she reminded me of a scripture I'd learned as a child at a time when children still learned such things. The verse she quoted went something like this, 

"The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and..., my strength, in whom I will trust."

"There it is. There was no decision to make. It was laid out for me in. no uncertain terms."

"And so I followed the path that led to the banks of Fountain Lagoon and there he was, my Rock. And just as Mockingbird suggested, he is always there for me, always. Each day, I greet him with a handshake (or the equivalent; more like a pat, actually). I express my gratitude that he's there for me and then I'm ready for anything that life may offer up."

"But what about, Feldspar?" she asked.

"Oh, right. Sorry," I said. "Didn't mean to leave Feldspar dangling like that. Rock introduced us. Actually, Feldspar showed up one day and introduced himself but he said that Rock had recommended he do so. We've been pals ever since."

"You have an interesting life, Genome," she said.

"Interesting, yes," I said, "but a bit of a jumble from time to time."

I glanced at Lupe--you didn't forget that Lupe was among those present? I looked at her and found her holding her head in her hands and shaking it back and forth. I asked if she felt light-headed and offered to get her a cookie but she waved the suggestion away.

And so, dear reader, there you have it. The subject of this post emerges from the words in exactly the same way that consciousness emerges from the collapse of the quantum wave function, i.e.

And there it is. The subject of this post emerges from the lines of this post in exactly the same way that consciousness emerges from the collapse of the wave function according to the math function that serves as the foundation of quantum mechanics.

Life Keeps Bringing Me Back

"Lupe, do you think that Animal Control always uses humane methods to solve a critter problem? Do you think they relocate the animals and do you think that if the miscreants are cats and dogs and such, do you think they try to find homes for them?"

I probably should have said Good morning or How are you when I entered Cafe Luna but I'd been thinking about animal control all the way from Leland, and what with the Memorial Bridge closed, the trip had taken much longer than usual.

"Hold on," she said. "Take a deep breath, please. What's this all about anyway? Do you have an animal problem?"

"You don't know how happy I am to hear you say the word,  anyway, instead of anyways. Do you realize that almost everyone says anyways today? I know it's becoming socially acceptable but it's considered incorrect by dictionaries. And what other trusted authoritative source do we have?"

"Genome!" she said. "Get a grip; chillax, or whatever it is your generation uses. You're hypomanic and I'm not going to have this conversation with you unless you calm down. Now, don't say anything for a few seconds and ask Amy to close her eyes and think of alpine meadows."

If you're not familiar with Princess Amy, then where have you been for the last 12 years? I don't have time to go into it now, but you can always find her by using the search feature at the top of this blog page.

Now, let's get back to the story...

I stopped talking for a moment. I took a breath. I suggested to Amy that she think of alpine meadows full of flowers and I may have used the term, blanketed with flowers. I'm not sure why unless I've heard that term somewhere before.

We writers do like to be original but we recognize that we are nothing without those who came before us. Our minds it seems move along grooves laid down long ago by those who continue to inspire us. You might say that we find them groovy.

At any rate, I followed Lupe's suggestion and had a talk with Amy. Bite me! " she said. Amy said those words, not Lupe. Lupe would never. At least I think she wouldn't. It was Amy, who was so rude and I thought it most rude considering how close we've become lately. 

Opening my eyes, having returned from my meditative encounter with the little tyrant, I found that I still had the floor and so continued with my rant. Would you call it a rant? Seems a bit harsh but perhaps it's on point.

"Using the wrong word or phrase is becoming universally accepted," I said. "I seldom hear anyone use the word, fewer, even in advertising copy. In fact, I've heard TV advertising talking about less friends, less interruptions, and less annoying interruptions.

As far as that last bit is concerned, I'd think that less annoying interruptions would be preferred over the opposite."

"People often get confused," said Claudia, "about whether the term you and I should be used or if the correct term is you and me. It depends on the context, of course, but you knew that didn't you?"

Did I mention that Claudia was among those accounted for? Well, she was, and I was beginning to feel that this young woman had the right stuff. She seemed to understand exactly where I was going with my observations.

"Claudia," said Lupe, "don't encourage him. This all started with a question about animal control, remember?"

"That's right," I said, "animal control. Like when you have squirrels in the attic or raccoons in the basement."

"Squirrels in the attic?" said Lupe. "Is your problem squirrels in the attic, or bats in the belfry? Do you need animal control or is it Princess Amy control that you need?"

I sighed and gave the whole affair a moment of reflection. Not too unlike the meditative moment I mentioned above but without engaging Amy.

"Right," I said. "Thank you, Lupe. I misjudged you. I apologize."

"You know I'm always here for you, she said.

"Me too," said Claudia.

"And I'm eternally grateful," I said. And after another moment of reflection, I said, 

"Life keeps bringing me back to you, no matter what I do. It seems to have a mind of its own."

The Explanation

My two friends returned to our table in Cafe Luna with caffeine reinforcements and I took a deep breath to calm the anxious mind. I knew Claudia would have a lot of questions and I knew that I wouldn't have answers for them all. I could only hope that Lupe would be able to smooth any rough spots that I left in conversation.

"I don't understand," said Claudia. "Death's assistant? Does that mean you have something to do with people dying?"

Lupe gave her a concerned look and placed the palm of her hand on Claudia's forehead.

"Oh, no," I said. "Of course not. We simply facilitate the soul's ascension by helping it get to the right person."

"What about the sewer harpies or whatever? What's that got to do with it."

"Maybe I should begin with how I got involved in the first place. You see, a few years ago I read a novel called Dirty Job. The author is Christopher Moore."

"He wrote Lust Lizard," she said.

"That's right."

"And Sequined Love Nun."

"Yes, well in Dirty Job the main character is recruited to become a soul merchant. That's the name used in the book. I don't particularly like it but there it is.

Anyway, I loved the book and think of it often because of some of the strange events that happen in my daily life. Eventually, I realized that my life parallels the main character in the book.

The more I thought about it, the more I seemed to be living a life much like Charlie Asher's. He's the main character."

"Wow," said Claudia. "This reminds me of the Will Farrell movie, Stranger Than Fiction. In that movie, the main character is living a story that is being written by a fiction author."

"Hmm," I said for she had interested me strangely with this idea of actually living a life that is the storyline in a novel. "Tell me more," I said.

"Well, he's living a normal life it seems, until he begins hearing a voice narrating his life in real-time, sort of."

"Incredulous!" I said.

"Incredible," said Lupe.

"Exactly," I said. "Sounds so much like my life."

"No it doesn't," said Lupe. "It sounds nothing like your life unless you throw away all the backstory that we already know about you and Princess Amy."

"And don't forget the hypothalamus," I said. "I watched an episode of Closer to the Truth last night and discovered that the behaviors resulting from Princess Amy's analyses are initiated by the hypo-T." 

"Whatever!" said Lupe. "You're not living a story in a book of fiction. It's much more complex and a lot deeper than that. 

I'll give you the full rundown after dinner tonight," she said to Claudia.

"Deeper and more complex?" said Claudia. "I'm sorry, Genome it sounds serious, but don't worry, I'm confident that Lupe and I can help you with it. Keep confident and it will all work out."

I must admit, her cheerful attitude and generous offer to be a member of the Genome team did help to lift my spirit. I realized that I don't have to go through all this alone. I felt much better. 

A few moments of silence passed with the two girls looking at each other as if to say, What now? 

"What now?" said Claudia.

"My mom says that it's either get a barista job at Starbucks or enroll in Cape Fear Community College," said Lupe.

That's when I realized that these two downtown girls were in the middle of a dilemma of their own. I decided to hang around and listen for a change. You never know when you're going to learn something by simply paying attention. 

And besides, perhaps I could contribute something to the conversation to make them feel better. Stranger things have happened.